I had a thought last night while soaking in a bathtub with honeysuckle and cherry essential oils: maybe I’m going through this “52 weeks of Allie” thing the wrong way.
Sure, I go to the gym now, but I seem to be losing sight of the real underlying issue: my health. I even gained some weight back!
I feel like I don’t go to the gym for the sake of my health: I lose sight when I get there and say “how many calories can I burn?” and push myself to near exhaustion. While I agree you should always push yourself at the gym, I feel like I’m not concentrating on actual health, but how other people perceive me versus what the purpose of going to the gym really is.
Health Vs. Weight Loss
I’d be lying if I said people’s off-handed comments or blatant stares don’t hurt me. Everywhere you turn, you see it: be it outside in the world, on the computer in forums (ESPECIALLY on forums) or seeing advertisements, the push is to lose weight at any cost. You are shamed if you don’t lose weight and shamed if you haven’t lose enough by a certain time.
There are times when I’m so consumed with how many calories or fat are in my dinner, I forget what and WHY I need to put in my body versus caloric intake. I really haven’t been putting nutrition in my body. It’s been a sliding downhill slope of calories and not nutrients.
I took that bath yesterday because I feel like I let the spiritual side of me slide (my religious post is here). I always feel like my thoughts are clearer in water. I’ve been pleasing everyone else and not taking time for myself!
I strongly feel as though I should concentrate on my health and nutrients versus “how many pounds can I lose in a week if I do X,Y and Z” starting with taking it easy from calorie counting.
- Maybe instead of logging food as soon as I’m done eating, I should wait until a certain time of day to do this as a “summary” and not a “oh shit, I did THAT?”
- Maybe I should go to the gym for the purpose of having a more flexible and enduring body instead of “how much weight can I lose?”
- Maybe I should concentrate more on my spiritual and well-being (including health). I decided to switch to the Nerd Fitness “Druid” to explore this side